LET'S GO NAKED...

It's another beautiful day. The weather is nice, going out is the right thing to do but with this COVID19 it's hard to get out. 
The thoughts of wearing a mask, putting on gloves, measuring, and putting a distance between myself and the next human is all too much. So, sitting indoors and navigating the world through the gram is the new way of life.

On the gram, I stumble on Eve's page and she talked about freeing the boobs, the nipple, and how guys go crazy about the things. I think she was even asking why guys go gaga about that. A guy's comment stuck with me and he explained it's not necessarily the boobs but the concept that it's hidden and humans love to steal, go out in search of what is hidden. He further explained that if guys and ladies wherein the pool, it's okay, but once the same ladies dressed the same way enter a banking hall, 'na problems be that.'
He said something about it being the same reason rape is higher in climes where women cover and cover but it's less where women dress freely. He ended by saying "let's all go naked and see the gaga go extinct".

Ha! Analysis wey dey burst brain. 

I bring it down to my home when I just newly married. Hubby would tap or grab my body playfully and say "It's all mine".
Years after, as see finish has entered, nothing moves Bobo. On some days that I want to see if blood flows in his veins, I would wear the flimsiest of outfit and walk around the house, 'odechi!' Bobo is not moved. I try to twerk, bend over...' nothing mega' Dude carries on like nothing 'dey pa' I then advised myself,
"Biko stop parading around, stressing your already bad legs. This wan can 'kasara'. He is immune. The concept of gaga ti blow. See finish e have entered."

The fire, sparks, desire is burning low. Life and its pressure don't even help. The average African man doesn't also do so well in romance, expression, communication, and having a love language.
   
For girls like me who fed our minds with Mills and boons and other romantic novels, it's a hard blow.

The good thing about being human, though, is the ability to learn, unlearn, and relearn.

The ministry must move. Things must be balanced. There must be a conscious effort from both parties to make it work. We both must be considerate to meet in the middle and work on both our needs. 
The mad rush of emotions wears out but how we carry on saves the union.

Photo credit: photocase.com
Written by RoyaltyFly
RoyaltyFly is our guest writer who loves to pen down her many life experiences in her journey to healing.

I hope you enjoyed reading and you are able to learn a few things here.
Please share your thoughts in the comment section.

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Rachel Jesuseme

Comments

  1. Nice one Rachel. I have come to realise that what works for Mr A might not work for Mr B, theres always one little difference and truly it requires a conscious effort to make the fire of romance keep burning in our marriages.
    Study your partner and know what works for him or her, never compare.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us, Joseph.
      Truly comparism doesn't do it in marriage.

      Delete
  2. Hmmmm analysis wey dey burst brain. But why are African men so not romantic.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A million dollar question we are still finding answers for. Thank you for reading Orry.

      Delete
  3. Nice piece. African men, once they have seen/eaten the forbidden fruit, the burning desire to have you vanishes.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmmm! This one is loud. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us.

      Delete
    2. When they have eaten enough, it won't be regular like before unless u device anoda means to get him going..#change your routine

      Delete
    3. Hahahaha #Change your routine. Interesting. That phrase, African men, once they've eaten the forbidden fruit loses appetite for the 'woman' they were involved with, really doesn't apply to all men. But a woman should learn to be the 'bitch' in her relationship if she really desires respect and honour from her man. The word "Bitch" is an acronym. Not the usual Bitchy woman, far from it.

      Delete
    4. Kenneth and Faith, analysis wey dey burst brain indeed.
      "Change your routine" and "be your man's bitch"

      We are taking notes.

      Delete
  4. Where are my African brothers? Please come and defend yourselves here.
    How romantic are you?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That phrase is relative. If the guy's original intention is to eat the forbidden fruit from the get go then that and nothing else will be his sole aim. But when he likes her and want go all the way through with her then he won't get tired of it. That's where creativity and spice will play a huge role.

      Delete
    2. Talk about bringing the creativity in you.
      This is serious marriage counseling 101.
      Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

      Delete
  5. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  6. We still have the very few African men though!!!! But most marriages over familiarities makes the Vibe and romance die a natural death...
    If only the effort use in getting the woman at the beginning can still be used all through the marriage the romance and the Vibe would still be hot... but life and circumstances you know happens!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmmm! See finish plus life circumstances. This one is loud.
      Thanks for sharing your thoughts Joy.

      Delete
  7. Apart from see finish and life circumstances, the family expenses will reset the man's brain. Especially if the man is not well to do. Even if you wear skimpy dress in front of him, all hesh seeing is house rent, school fees, utility bills, etc. You will think he's looking at you but the guy don go far in thinking. No be person go tell you to respect yourself go sidon

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hehehe! *Insert soundtrack for my African brothers* "under pressure, we say we under pressure"

      Delete
    2. I believe this is true. The new realities of responsibilities that were not present in the beginning usually shifts all thoughts of romance and anything related to the back of a man's mind. This is just one of the many ways in which marriage is hard work. Life's pressures or not, both parties must be committed to deliberately keep things fresh and hot. Make God epp us o

      Delete
  8. African men this African men that...but the onus is on both the man and the woman..the African Man is stressed all round..the stress from our country alone is enough to ruin the basic instinct of romance..i laff when folks try to compare an African Man to a European or American..this life no balance at all..that being said couples must intentionally seek ways to keep the fire of romance burning..in Africa one has to be intentional about life..in Africa we have to provide for ourselves all that we need from electricity,security to Romance and Love in our homes..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmmm! We must be intentional, Seek ways to keep the fire of romance burning.
      Thank you for sharing your thoughts Maximus.

      Delete
  9. Although most African men are basically not keen on romantic gestures, I however believe the financial status is a determinant and so water down any urge or display of romance

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmmm! Na who chop bellefull dey drink water.
      Thanks for sharing your thoughts Success.

      Delete
  10. Very serious analysis indeed. But does it have to be only females that go naked? Oya na let's do it in one accord. men should also learn to start showing what they have too. We should not be the only ones flaunting. Hahahaha
    I remember the day Hubby was doing sexy dance for me in boxers, laugh nearly burst belle!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hehehe, Tory_Teller why na!
      Exactly, it should be a conscious effort by parties to make the union work, especially in the area of romance.

      Delete

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